To The Trailblazers

Guest post by Emily Romero

Note from Caitlin from Dose of Wonder:

This guest post from Emily Romero comes from her forthcoming book on building Self-Trust. Emily is an author and former somatic trauma therapist. She writes about how connecting to your intuition, your inner child, and your nervous system can help you develop the confidence to live the life you desire. This chapter follows a section of the book on “living intentionally”. Perfect for January 1st - you can also get a free guide - start this year with intention.

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Photo of author

There are downsides to living an intentional life though. It takes way more effort and energy to blaze your own trail. To question your past decisions and be deliberate about your choices moving forward. Instead of following the well-paved path.

Especially when you’re first starting out. 

Even though I’ve sat in tens of thousands of therapy sessions during my career, I can still poignantly remember some of them. Vivid moments forever etched in my soul.

One, in particular, has been on repeat in my mind lately. Probably because what I said to her has been the reminder I’ve repeatedly needed over the past year. 

She was vulnerably sharing her big and “audacious” dream with me. She was letting me in on her soul’s calling. The “assignment” she couldn’t get away from. Her passion was palpable. Infectious even. 

Damn, I have such a cool job. 

She was also relaying to me some of the feedback she’d gotten from other people around this idea of hers. And the common theme from everyone…

They didn’t get it. 

And they definitely didn’t understand why she’d even consider leaving something stable and predictable to follow this “thing” that didn’t even make sense. And their inability to see her vision, was tempting her to pull the emergency brake. 

She was doubting herself. Questioning what she knew inside to be true. Bargaining with herself to go back to the familiar path she’d been on before.

And, the parts that wanted her to return to the small box she’d lived her life in - made convincing points. Trying to seduce her… with logic and reason. 

What I said to her, is what I’m now reminding myself of: 

“They’re not supposed to ‘get it’ right now. It’s not for them. It’s your vision. If they ‘got it’ right now, it’d be because it’s already been done before.”

Recently, I shared the premise of this book with someone. And the vision I have of how writing plays a role in the larger ecosystem of my business. I explained how I envisioned the structure of the book so it wouldn’t be like a typical self-help book. 

Her confused, wide-eyed response?

“Okaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyy……..”   😐

Her face immediately connected me to my old companion, Doubt. 

Her expression was in cahoots with the part of me who wrote, “Who the fuck am I to write a book?!” in my journal the day after this book idea came to me.

Thankfully, it didn’t take long for the advice I’d given to my former client to flood my mind. And I remembered.

It’s okay that she doesn’t get it. It’s not hers to “get” right now.

This doesn’t take away from the fact that I will eventually have to work on how I describe my vision, for the vision to unfold. At some point, it will be important to speak concisely and articulately about what my intuition is telling me.

But that time isn’t now. 

It’s okay, and likely necessary, to be in the messy stage of trusting. I’m the only one I have to convince to keep going. 

I don’t need other people to “get it” to trust myself. 

And my hunch is…. that someday, she will get it. And it will seem obvious.

Thanks so much to Emily for being a guest on Dose of Wonder and sharing her story with us here! And don’t forget to check out her Substack Curiosity Rising - The Self-Trust Journey,below (or here if viewing on the app and you don’t see a link below).