I loved learning about this! The fact that there's a reason we have less harsh judgments on others for doing the same things we're doing... I always wondered about that... it seemed such a contradiction... fun read!
I have a life to live not a life to tidy up all the time. Although no judgment on the neat freaks either. We all have different comfort zones when it comes to chaos and mess. Sunsets, books, cooking delicious food, roaming the forest, working in the garden … too many things to experience that leaves very little room, or time, to be “tidy”. I don’t need tidy on my grave stone.
I have a life to live not a life to tidy up all the time. Although no judgment on the neat freaks either. We all have different comfort zones when it comes of chaos and mess. Sunsets, books, cooking delicious food, roaming the forest, working in the garden … too many things to experience that leaves very little room, or time, to be “tidy”. I don’t need tidy on my grave stone.
Caitlin, I love this topic. And l love this piece. Alnost everything I write feels like I am putting my beautiful mess out there. I have learned to love it. I believe it makes us and our work relatable. I have become allergic to fake. Some people have written to me that I often portray my life as difficult. Well, that’s bc it is! What they are missing is that I find this aspect of my life just as beautiful and valuable as the good parts (which I also talk about, but we have a tendency to notice and highlight the bad, as this piece confirms). My life is challenging and I am full of joy and gratitude (even when I am in a corner crying or screaming at the top of my lungs bc I need to let out Some steam... and even here.. yeah, I could do better, but it is ok. Maybe next time. I one the survival of my 30 year marriage to this ability to love thru our beautiful mess).
When we accept our own beautiful mess, we are less likely to judge each other's. We stop expecting people to be perfect. And this cultivates acceptance and unity. We may also stop comparing everything to the unrealistic images we see on social media. This is so toxic.
I just saw a video by @marcusbridgewater on Notes. He says that he chooses joy. This doesn't mean his life is all or mostly joyful. I really appreciated it. He also wrote a beautiful letter of love for Elizabeth Gilbert's substack where He shares his unsettledness out. All this to say: yes, may we expose our beautiful messes... homes, relationships, serves (I am still working on this last one). Sending love and gratitude 💓
Wow that some people have contacted you saying that you always write about your life being difficult!! like WTF?! lol like you said, you write about it because you're being honest, because it is! And wow, congrats on your 30 year marriage! I have been married 23 years so far, and I think, like you it's because I embrace the beautiful mess of it all!
Ooohh, i'll have to hunt that video down by Marcus on choosing joy! Thanks for mentioning it.
And thanks for taking the time for commenting so deeply and genuinely on my piece! I'm so glad you enjoyed it :) (and thanks for sharing it too!)
Caitlin, it’s so true how we often judge our own vulnerabilities as weaknesses, while others see them as courage and authenticity. By embracing our messiness, we allow ourselves to connect more deeply with others, showing that it’s okay to be imperfect. Practicing self-compassion and seeing our flaws as part of being human helps us quiet that inner critic. Thanks for the reminder that vulnerability is a strength, not something to hide 🫶
Haha, thank you, Caitlin! Honestly, your post inspired me – it made it so easy to keep it simple. But I think we’re both just speaking from the heart! 💖
I loved learning about this! The fact that there's a reason we have less harsh judgments on others for doing the same things we're doing... I always wondered about that... it seemed such a contradiction... fun read!
Thanks! Glad you enjoyed ☺️
I have a life to live not a life to tidy up all the time. Although no judgment on the neat freaks either. We all have different comfort zones when it comes to chaos and mess. Sunsets, books, cooking delicious food, roaming the forest, working in the garden … too many things to experience that leaves very little room, or time, to be “tidy”. I don’t need tidy on my grave stone.
I have a life to live not a life to tidy up all the time. Although no judgment on the neat freaks either. We all have different comfort zones when it comes of chaos and mess. Sunsets, books, cooking delicious food, roaming the forest, working in the garden … too many things to experience that leaves very little room, or time, to be “tidy”. I don’t need tidy on my grave stone.
Totally agree!!
Yes to all of this. When we show the world our underbelly, we tenderize the connection. And doesn’t the world need more tenderness?
100%!! 👏👏
Caitlin, I love this topic. And l love this piece. Alnost everything I write feels like I am putting my beautiful mess out there. I have learned to love it. I believe it makes us and our work relatable. I have become allergic to fake. Some people have written to me that I often portray my life as difficult. Well, that’s bc it is! What they are missing is that I find this aspect of my life just as beautiful and valuable as the good parts (which I also talk about, but we have a tendency to notice and highlight the bad, as this piece confirms). My life is challenging and I am full of joy and gratitude (even when I am in a corner crying or screaming at the top of my lungs bc I need to let out Some steam... and even here.. yeah, I could do better, but it is ok. Maybe next time. I one the survival of my 30 year marriage to this ability to love thru our beautiful mess).
When we accept our own beautiful mess, we are less likely to judge each other's. We stop expecting people to be perfect. And this cultivates acceptance and unity. We may also stop comparing everything to the unrealistic images we see on social media. This is so toxic.
I just saw a video by @marcusbridgewater on Notes. He says that he chooses joy. This doesn't mean his life is all or mostly joyful. I really appreciated it. He also wrote a beautiful letter of love for Elizabeth Gilbert's substack where He shares his unsettledness out. All this to say: yes, may we expose our beautiful messes... homes, relationships, serves (I am still working on this last one). Sending love and gratitude 💓
Hi Danni,
That is so great you're anti-fake!
Wow that some people have contacted you saying that you always write about your life being difficult!! like WTF?! lol like you said, you write about it because you're being honest, because it is! And wow, congrats on your 30 year marriage! I have been married 23 years so far, and I think, like you it's because I embrace the beautiful mess of it all!
Ooohh, i'll have to hunt that video down by Marcus on choosing joy! Thanks for mentioning it.
And thanks for taking the time for commenting so deeply and genuinely on my piece! I'm so glad you enjoyed it :) (and thanks for sharing it too!)
🙏❤️ Here it is: https://substack.com/@marcusbridgewater/note/c-87161203?r=3g3t74
Thank you 💕
Caitlin, it’s so true how we often judge our own vulnerabilities as weaknesses, while others see them as courage and authenticity. By embracing our messiness, we allow ourselves to connect more deeply with others, showing that it’s okay to be imperfect. Practicing self-compassion and seeing our flaws as part of being human helps us quiet that inner critic. Thanks for the reminder that vulnerability is a strength, not something to hide 🫶
100% Dana! and so perfectly put!! (now I'm envious of your succinctness on the subject! LOL)
Haha, thank you, Caitlin! Honestly, your post inspired me – it made it so easy to keep it simple. But I think we’re both just speaking from the heart! 💖
🙌🙏💖