The Quiet Power of Gratitude

A gentle companion for mental health

There’s a kind of gratitude that’s loud and performative - like thank-you speeches and choreographed social media posts. But that’s not the kind I focus on and try to bring into my daily life as much as possible. Which is the quieter kind that has truly got me through some of the harder chapters of life. It’s subtle, personal and inward.

It’s the kind that shows up at the end of a messy day when all I can muster is, “I’m grateful that today is done.”
It’s the pause I take when I see flower that I hadn’t noticed yesterday - like the giant, beautiful peach coloured rose blooming in my neighbour’s garden.
It’s the kind that doesn’t try to fix the hard stuff — but instead sits with it and really experiences it.

Gratitude, in its truest form, is not about pretending everything’s okay. It’s about riding the roller coaster and letting the light in anyway. And when it comes to our mental health, that can make all the difference.

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Beyond the Buzzword

Let’s be honest: “gratitude” has become a bit of a trend. It’s tossed into captions and corporate wellness emails like a seasoning — probably to make everything feel a little easier to take. But if we strip away the performance of it, what’s left?

What’s left is real gratitude.

A grounded practice.

A choice to notice.

A way to come back to ourselves when the world feels unsteady.

Psychologists have studied gratitude extensively and I’ve listened to what feels like a million podcasts on the topic — not just as a feel-good habit, but as a legitimate tool for mental well-being. Regular gratitude practices have been shown to reduce symptoms of depression and anxiety, improve sleep, boost immune function, and increase long-term happiness, which is just amazing. And it isn’t fluffy optimism or toxic positivity. This is the slow rewiring of a brain learning to see life in fuller colour.

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What Gratitude Really Does for the Brain

Here’s where it gets interesting. This is what I love - the neuroscience of practices like gratitude and happiness on the brain. Gratitude isn’t just a nice feeling — it’s a pattern we can cultivate. When we intentionally reflect on what we’re thankful for, our brain activates regions associated with emotional regulation, empathy, and reward. It boosts the production of dopamine and serotonin — the so-called ‘happiness hormones’ - the same brain chemicals that many antidepressants aim to increase.

Over time, these small moments of thankfulness create new neural pathways (it’s called neuroplasticity). The more we practice, the easier it becomes to find something — anything — worth holding onto. And when life is heavy, that shift in perception can become a life raft.

It won’t solve everything. But it can help soften the edges.

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Practicing Gratitude in Real Life (Without Making It a Chore)

And guess what? You’ll be happy to hear that you don’t need a fancy journal (unless you want to splurge), or a 10-step ritual to practice gratitude.

In fact, the simpler it is, the more likely it is to stick. Here are a few ways to begin:

• One Line a Day
  Keep a small notebook by your bed. Each night, before going to sleep, write one sentence: “Today I’m grateful for…” That’s it. Some days it might be deep and reflective. Other days it might be “Finally washed my hair.” Both count.
  

• Gratitude Walks
  Go for a walk and silently name the things you notice and appreciate: the way the wind moves through the trees, a neighbour’s garden, the rhythm of your footsteps. Let gratitude move through your body. I love love love mindful walking meditation, and I rarely do it…but whenever I do, I feel amazing. I notice things I haven’t before, even if they’ve been there all along (like the beautiful peach rose)!
  

• Text Someone a Thank-You
  Send someone a spontaneous message to someone who’s impacted you — a friend, a mentor, even a stranger who once held a door. Well, obviously you can’t text the stranger - but you can still send them an intention of gratitude. It can ripple outward in ways you may never fully see.
  

• Micro-Moments of Mindfulness
  Pause for five seconds during the day and just notice. The warmth of your tea/coffee mug. The sound of birds. The feeling of an exhale (I often take a big exhale, just breathing out all the stale air - and my husband always goes ‘why the big sigh?’ and I say (maybe with a sigh!): I’m not sighing, I’m just exhaling). That tiny pause is a seed of gratitude.

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When Gratitude Feels Like Too Much

Here’s a hot take: it’s something not enough people say: You’re allowed to not feel grateful. Yes, I said not. Especially when you’re in survival mode or when everything feels like too much.

Toxic positivity tries to bypass pain by insisting we “just be grateful.” and ‘no negativity here, just positive thoughts (i’m looking at you, specific running coach). But real gratitude doesn’t bypass. It coexists. It sits with grief. It honours anger. It whispers, “Yes, this is hard — and still, something small is good.”

If all you can find today is one sliver of light — a laugh, a moment of calm between storms — that is more than enough.

Gratitude doesn’t ask for perfection. Just presence, just awareness, just showing up.

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Living With It, Not Just Writing It Down

Eventually, gratitude becomes less of a task and more of a lens - a way of living and being. You start to notice things you once passed by and didn’t see. You start to speak to yourself a little more kindly and with more compassion and empathy. You start to reach for gentleness, even when it’s hard.

I think of gratitude as a kind of quiet courage (and this is a little nod to a Quiet Courage Kit I’m going to be releasing soon-ish in the future in my Ko-Fi shop!). It’s not loud. It’s not flashy. But it’s resilient.

It shows up in the trenches and stays.
It turns toward life even when it hurts.
And over time, it helps us remember that even here — even now — some part of us is still rooting for joy.

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A Small Invitation

Today, don’t force gratitude. Don’t perform it. Just notice what’s already here. It all comes back to noticing. To awareness.

Maybe it’s the softness of your blanket.
Maybe it’s the music playing in the background.
Maybe it’s the simple fact that you’re still here — still trying, still showing up — moment by moment, day by day.

That’s enough.

And in case no one’s told you lately: I’m grateful you’re here, too.

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✨ Love this reflection?
You can download a beautifully simple 8-point infographic of the key ideas over in my Ko-fi shop. It’s pay-what-you-want — perfect as a gentle reminder, a journal page, or a quiet moment to come back to.

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If this piece resonates, check out more reflections on my Substack and on Medium. For those navigating burnout, big feelings, or the quiet rebuilding of a life that feels more whole — you're in good company. Come sit with me there. And keep your eyes peeled soon for my Wonder Kit - a digital kit of prompts and exercises and invitations (and soon to be coming expansion packs like Wonder For The Weary which has prompts and practices for burnout, heartbreak, emotional fog, or slow seasons).

If this letter found you at the right time, feel free to share it with someone else who might need a little wonder today.

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