Wonder in the Ordinary

What it means to live a “small life” well

I’ve written about this topic before, but I feel it’s important so I’m talking about it again.

Maybe it’s just me, but is modern life kind getting on your nerves? Does it often seem overwhelming? If so, this is your friendly dose of wonder reminder that smallness isn’t a bad thing. It isn’t failure.

It’s niching down and paying more attention to what you have. It’s an intentional way of being in a culture and society that wants everything to be big and brash and loud and grand and out there so that everyone can see what we’re doing and how we’re living.

Have you ever felt the pressure of comparison? Of course you have. We all have, because it’s what our modern society thrives on – subtly asking us to be more, accomplish more, prove more. Even when you know that you’re really just comfortable where you are, and how you are, living an ordinary, mundane, quiet, ‘small’ life. And since when was that a bad thing?

I guess since the rise of social media and the internet age, probably. Let’s just blame that on, well, most things!

And it’s easy to feel like we’re not doing enough with our lives if they are highlight reel worthy. It seems like everything has to be big and in your face – something exciting enough to post on social media to family, friends, even masses of strangers – like landing a dream job, launching the next big thing, reaching that viral moment, capturing that scenic trip with curated captions and that ‘just so’ pose.

And even if there’s nothing inherently wrong with any of those, they can sometimes kind of take us away and make us forget that it’s okay just to be And while there’s nothing wrong with those things, sometimes they take us away from something that is probably more important and that we’ve just relegated to the background of our lives – the importance of a smaller life, a more full, rich, deep life – less superficial.

I think this so called ‘smallness’ or ordinary-ness isn’t a bad thing. It doesn’t mean anything is lacking (though we might feel it is compared to those more outwardly living moments), but rather that it’s a way of living that is deeper because it isn’t shouting for attention.

It’s leading your life with more presence and care and realness that isn’t visible on the surface. There’s no Instagram captions for this kind of living. It’s a different kind of rhythm – one you, not society, chooses. It’s a fight back against the idea that only the lives that are out there for the rest of us to see are the ones that are meaningful.

The Beauty of Living ‘Small’

As a society, we need to learn to slow down. Today’s hustle culture with so much information thrown at us from everywhere we look – TV, online, other people, there’s seemingly no way to escape it.

So there’s wonder and magic in taking time to make your coffee or tea just the way you like it each morning. Or in taking the time to notice something new when walking the same places you usually do, but you’ve just never really paid attention. In laughing at a joke so long with a close friend that you barely remember why you started laughing in the first place. Or maybe it’s the way your cat stretches itself out in that one patch of sunlight on the living room floor. A ‘small’, or maybe I should say more deliberate, life is found in any moment as long as you take the time to pause and revel in it. It’s in handwritten notes and comfy routines, like using your favourite mug every morning.

There’s a wisdom in living more slowly, more deliberately. In not rushing through life so fast that everything becomes a blur and you can’t clearly remember any of it. It’s being there for the people in your life – real, living, breathing people that you interact with in person. In listening to others deeply instead of caring about how many followers or subscribers or likes you have on your devices. It’s for who you are as a person, not how many miles you’ve traveled or how many videos you’ve taken (and shared). It’s for your penchant for baking fun animal shaped sweet treats or building your personal library with gently used books. A ‘small life’, when you really stop to look at it, is really a big life. It allows you to really be present and savour everything more deeply and prioritize realness over reels

Comfy Rituals, Quiet Joy

Living small, more intentionally, gives us permission to ground ourselves in the ritual and rhythm of everyday life. To be more present in things we do and not try and multitask every single thing we do (for example, I turned off the podcast I was listening to, to write this article. It’s permission to take joy seriously, not just being productive.

There’s something magical about paying attention to the ordinary. About realizing that This moment matters. Even if no one else sees it. We don’t have to put everything on a grand stage and make everything a spectacle.

And isn’t that what wonder is all about? Really noticing what others aren’t paying attention to? And finding joy and amazement in the little things? Tiny joys. And making something meaningful from the things that are right in front of you.

Living small doesn’t mean shrinking yourself. It means allowing your senses to expand to embrace things you usually gloss over, and not measuring your life by comparing it to someone else’s.

Comparison is the thief of joy as they say.

The Richness of Enough

There’s a line I think of from the poet William Stafford:

"It is important that awake people be awake" (from his poem A Ritual To Read To Each Other)

To be awake in your life—not just kind of sleep walking through it on autopilot as most (maybe all?) of us do. And not just waiting for the next big thing, the next exciting development in your life –but being okay with what is, right now, just how it is. It’s a reclaiming of sorts.

We need more people who are living small lives well. The ones who pour their soft intentions into things that are not flashy. The ones who are steady and reliable and not always moving forward at a pace too fast to catch up. The people who know their neighbours and who tend gently to micro-herbs in windowsill planters.

This way of living is not a failure. Instead it should be the foundation for all of us.

In a society that often equates more and faster and harder with better, a small, intentional life says: this is enough.

And when you believe in that way of being, something amazing and beautiful happens: you begin to see how magical and powerful ‘enough’ really is. And how it isn’t about settling, but awakening to the magic of what is already there around us (and has been the whole time, we just have never paused long enough to notice it).

So here’s your gentle invitation:

Notice something tiny today. Something ordinary. Let yourself love it a little extra. Light your fancy (and perhaps overpriced) candle. Stir, and sip, your tea slowly. Call the person you always mean to call but rarely do. Choose the cozy. Presence. The small thing that brings joy.

Because small lives aren’t small at all. They’re just softly simmering with wonder.

If this letter found you at the right time, feel free to share it with someone else who might need a little wonder today.

✨ Love this reflection?
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With heartfelt thanks, always.
— Caitlin

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